The Insane Ways I Overcome Writer’s Block

What’s going on In your Pal Jimmy D’s head this day?
 
Nothing….except work, work, work…and more work.
 
(Unless you’d be more interested in hearing about my sudden craving for a dozen glazed doughnuts…HMMmmm…oh yeah, it’s not Food Porn Friday yet….durn. )
 
It’s Hump Day AKA yet another Writer’s Update Wednesday.
 
This week, I’ll start off by saying, the current book ideas are coming along at a pretty decent pace, though I have had some minor distractions here and there.
 
Okay, yaaaay, post done, gooodby—but NOT SO FAST THERE, BUCKO!!
 
Before I go, I’d like to talk to you about something. Particularly, what is one of THE BIGGEST problems writers face when trying to crank out their work??
 
(HINTY-HINT-HINT: It’s the post title!! )
 
Right, Writer’s Block!!!
 
(Good, you got it, now go help yourself to a cookie out of your cupboard on me…on you….really! 😉 )
 
So what are some of the ways that I, Yours Truly, a (future) utterly famous and  (perhaps, but probably not) brilliant writer deal with the plague of writer’s block??
 
Glad you (didn’t really) asked!!
 
If you’re feeling super stuck on your current story, perhaps it might be a good idea to stop spinning your brain’s wheels in the mud, and UNPLUG from it for a bit. The following are a few quick exercises that you can do while your brain is stuck, and in the process of doing them, you just might get it UNstuck!
 
Six Words, One Story
 
One of the most fun way I find to eliminate the block is to play a little game called, “Six Words, One Story.” It really is as simple as that, train your brain and see if you can tell a little story in just six words….
 
Like this:
 
“The clown arrived. So, I wept.”
 
scary clown
 
OR…this:
 
“Farmer REALLY  loves Sheep. SEIZE him!!”
 
Not only does it help you to learn the principal that “breviy is the soul of wit” but who knows? You might even find another story to work on in there.
 
(Provided your six word stories are about something other than demented clowns and sick farmers who love their flock too TOO much 😉 )
 
Jingle Jangle Jingle, Baby
 
You know who some of the most “creative” people in the world are??
 
No, not artists, nor coke mules, are even people who try to illegally obtain bootleg cable and porno…
 
Coke Mule
Like my Coke mule? 😉
 
But rather, AD JINGLE PITCH MEN!!
 
You know their work even if you’ll never meet them. Stuck on your own work? Why not try your hand at writing a little “ditty” for a fictitious product??
 
Here’s a few quickie ones I came up with on one of my many days of blockage….Take a read:
 
Bojangles
 
AN OVERLY SMILING AFRICAN AMERICAN MAN, DRESSED IN A 1920’S ERA TUX WITH TAILS:
 
(singing and dancing)
 
Ohhhhhhhhh….
 
Don’t be a SAP, You know you’ve gotta take that CRAP!
 
Lookout-now you’ve got a disease!!
 
CHOIR OF CHILDREN CUTING IN HERE:
 
Public Toilet!!!
 
nasty public toilet
 
V.O. GUY AT THE END: A message from New York City Sewage and Sanitation….please enjoy our facilities responsibly…since we don’t. “
 
Not bad, huh?? 😉
 
Not only is it an exercise in creativity, but it could EVEN be a future career calling….if it doesn’t land you in the looney bin. Like it did for me. LOL  Just kidding.
 
 
 
Picture,  Picture
 
Along the same lines as above, only THIS time…see if you can’t write your own fake ad copy based on just ONE SINGLE PICTURE…
 
I do this all the time. Here is one suck…err…SUCH example, take a read of a few, reading friends and neighbors….
 
Canada Flag Bikini
 
THE REAL CAUSE OF POLAR ICE MELTING?? SUUUURE….WE CAN BELIEVE IT.
 
 
Our country may be the “Great White North” but our women are fantastically tan.
 
 
Okay, yeah, maybe not all of them are tan, but we are a nation that certainly has a lot of natural…untapped resources…and right before your eyes! Come by and click on to CANADA DATE, North America’s #1 online dating website for finding attractive, quality single Canadians, as voted by Online Dating magazine. We were also tapped as tops in “Friendly Customer Service” by J.D. Power and Associates. (Yep, we paid them.)
 
Friendly? Like, Shaaaaa, what else do you expect? We’re Canadian!
 
Duurrr.
 
 (Pssst…and we’re hot too!)
 
We have thousands of sexy, fun singles online every single day. That’s right, no puffed up numbers, no bait-and-switch pics No bots.. We’re the real deal, and we’re just waiting to snuggle up under the sheets with a saucy single guy like you!
 
This winter, let the best single women in the world warm up your love life…CHOOSE CANADA DATE!
 
——————
 
cheese-puff-bath
 
 

 

NOT THAT YOU WOULD DO THIS WITH YOUR CHEETOS, BUT YOU SHOULD…
(AND YOU COULD FILL YOUR TUB WITH MONEY INSTEAD!! )
 
We get it.
 
We know you love it.
 
Stop denying your urge to splurge.
 
With the power of that cheesy, pleeasey cravelicious orange powder in every popping bite, CHEETOS is worth the price. Where else are you gonna get that ultimate cheese snack rush? Your dignity? A shower? Yeaah, that’ll have to wait.
 
It’s CHEETOS time!
 
Show us your best clever “Orange Hands Nation” pics and videos and you could win a million bucks…and a year’s supply of your favorite CHEETOS snack flavor.
 
In Original, Nacho Cheese, Salsa Explosion, Flamin’ Hot…and even Puffs. (What? PUFFS?? You’re not that weird… are you? Ahh…whatever, we got your back anyway!)
 
Weirdo.
 
Live the Cheetah, be the Cheetah.
 
CHEETOSIt’s not just a snack, It’s a lifestyle!
———-
 
 
Damn, I’m goooooood, aren’t I??
 
Would you believe it took me less than FIVE minutes to pen both of those??? 😉
 
And last but all else fails, and your write’s block thing STILL won’t go away….
 
 
Just Give Up, and Do Some Freakin’ Research
 
You know, you don’t HAVE TO spend every waking moment writing your book, you could just break down and do some internet research on your topic….
 
big boobs cleavage
 
 
uhhh……yeaaah…YOUR TOPIC!!
 
And not…OTHER….things. 😀
 
(Then again, while you’re “researching” you could end up finding a great deal on some strange …uhh…expensive…Cuisinart …uhh….product…err…yeaaaaah…)
 
Bottom line, writer’s block is not an incurable disease, you CAN fight back and have some fun doing it…
 
Unless of course, you “catch” the block while sittin’ on a NYC public toilet!! *winkies* 😉
 
Once had a dream to lounge in a Jacuzzi filled to the brim, with Krispie Kreme Doughnuts,
 
J. Devious, ESQ.
 
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